The First Move - Lynne Durham

From The Waiting Bill

The First Move

Your statement showed you where you are waiting. Here is one move that stops it. There's one for each of the four waiting styles. Most of us are at least two, so read the others while you're here.

Showing all four

Waiting for a yesNext time it comes up

The Approver

The move: say what you think before you check in with anyone.

The next time you have an opinion and catch yourself waiting to hear if your manager or co-worker approves, say it first. Even to yourself. Practice saying what you want to say until you can say what you think out loud.

When. The next time you catch yourself drafting a message to your co-worker or wanting to chat about it over coffee instead of saying the thing. Use the first occasion that comes up, doesn't need to be the biggest one. The small ones are perfect practice.

What you get back. You know it happens now. You catch yourself in the moment. And you start stepping your way into changing it.

Why this matters. Because you stop waiting. The opinion was already yours. Saying it uplevels your positioning.

Waiting until it cannot be criticisedToday

The Standard

The move: send the piece of work. Today, at the standard it is at now.

Make note of how many edits or re-reads you've already done. If more than one, take a breath and imagine hitting send. Feel ok? Hit send for real.

A bonus move is to keep track of what happens: the emails, the projects, the work you submit. Does anything come back with questions or negative comments? You're building evidence that 1 or 2 revisions works.

When. ASAP. Whatever's been sitting in your to-do list longest, move it on today.

What you get back. More time. Being known for speedy results. And an evidence bank that good enough really is just that.

Why this matters. Because who doesn't want more time? Your work is already good enough. Building efficiency is upleveling your game.

Waiting to be askedStart now

The Invitation

The move: grab a few phrases, practice them at home, and when you're comfortable slip them into conversations, nicely and subtly.

  • "That's the sort of project I'd like to be in the mix for next time."
  • "I'd like a go at that."
  • "That one was mine. It came out well."
  • "Put me down for the next one."
  • "I'm aiming at [the role] in the next year or so."

Keep your chosen line in mind, and look for moments to slip it into conversations.

When. Now, start practicing right away. Also, set a reminder a week ahead of any one-to-one or team meeting.

What you get back. More opportunities that go your way. Less time waiting, more time doing. You've uplevelled your approach.

Why this matters. Because now your manager knows to include you in the conversations that uplevel your career.

Waiting for the right timeNext "one more"

The Right Time

The move: catch yourself next time you put "one more" in front of doing or saying something.

If you have an ask that hasn't been asked, practice saying it to the person who needs to hear it. If you have more than one ask, do them all! Practice saying what you want to say in the mirror until you can say it out loud.

When. The next time you think you need more time/qualification etc.

What you get back. You stop stopping yourself. You now have a way to see what was in the way.

Why this matters. Because you are ready now!

Nothing highlighted yet. Highlight the one your statement named and it will be waiting here.

Your move

What you marked, in one place, ready to print or copy.

Nothing marked so far.

Now you know what waiting costs.

When you make your move you'll start gaining your first hours back.

If you want to know why the waiting started, that's a whole other thing.

When you're ready, I want you to imagine it's nine at night and the meeting is still running in your head. After the Internal Authority Protocol you have a selection of tools and at least one sentence that stops it, and a page of your own facts to read instead.

Five lessons, four reset tools and twelve worksheets. $39, yours for good.

Get the Internal Authority Protocol

Lynne Durham

Executive coaching for women who are done waiting. lynnelife.com

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